How to Create More Clients Without Being Salesy

If traditional selling (think: greasy car salesman vibes) makes your skin crawl, this post is for you.

You’ve probably been told that to grow your business, you “just need to sell more”.

But if you’re like many of the Asian women entrepreneurs I work with, especially if you grew up as the eldest daughter of immigrants, selling can feel *complicated*.

Because selling is not just about the strategy. 

It’s about everything you were taught about money, worth and proving yourself.

After all, if you grew up hearing:

• “Don’t be greedy.”

• “Money doesn’t just fall from the sky” 

• “Work hard and wait to be noticed.”

…then OF COURSE selling feels heavy.

Especially if you’ve been taught that money is scarce & hard to get, you subconsciously think that you have to pry it out of people’s hands.

That’s where the pushy, convincing, salesy energy creeps in.

But here’s the truth most business coaching miss: 

Sales isn’t something you do to people; it’s something you do with them. 

Selling is a collaborative process where you help the other person make a clear decision - whether it’s yes or no.

✨ Here’s the reframe (and the more human way to do business):

At its core, sales is guiding someone through the decision-making process with honesty and care.

When you approach sales in this way, you feel more grounded, confident and in integrity. 

And your clients feel much safer saying yes. Win-win.

Ready for the three shifts that’ll help you decondition the “salesy” energy and sell in a way that feels more natural, aligned and wildly effective?

Let’s dive in!

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3 Shifts That’ll Help You Create More Clients Without Feeling Salesy

Shift #1: Focus on the Client, Not Yourself

Most “salesy” energy doesn’t come from greed, it comes from fear:

• Fear of not hitting your revenue goals

• Fear of not being enough

• Fear of if you ‘don’t make it happen’, everything will fall apart.

When you’re preoccupied about your own goals, selling starts to feel icky - because your energy shifts from service to self.

And that self-preservation mode? That doesn’t quite count as selling in the service industry ;) 

💎 The Shift: Selling isn’t about getting what you need. It’s about helping someone get what THEY need.

When you reorient your attention back to the person in front of you - what they want, what’s keeping them stuck and what would truly serve them, the pressure lifts.

You stop performing and start connecting.
You stop trying to sell and start listening.

And THIS is what builds trust.

When you sell from grounded service, people can feel it:  

They relax. They open up. They want to work with you - not because you convinced them, but because they felt safe & seen with your presence.

→ This is the first deconditioning, moving from fear-based selling to service-based selling:

You don’t need to manipulate to make a sale.

You need to be anchored in service - serving deeply & without attachment.

Shift #2: Remember You are on the Same Team

If there’s one reframe that changes everything about how you sell, it’s this:

You and your potential client are on the SAME side.

Selling isn’t “me versus them.”

It’s not you trying to get someone to say yes.

It’s two people exploring whether working together can help the client reach their transformation.

You and your potential client already want the same outcome - for them to feel better, grow & move closer to their desires.

💎 The Shift: Selling isn’t a battle to win, it’s an exploration towards a shared vision.

Let me tell you a story: 

My client used to tense up before every discovery call. She’d armor up, get defensive and lose her natural warmth trying to say the “right thing” to win the debate.

Every call felt like riding out to battle (which was exhausting for both peoples’ nervous systems).

Once she embodied the shift that her and her potential clients were on the same team - everything softened & became easier.

She was able to actually serve the client instead of fighting them, and tap into her natural gifts as a creative empath.

Within her first month of business, she signed her first $2K client with ease. And that was just the start of more steady clients.

→ This is the second deconditioning, moving from pressure to partnership:

You don’t have to convince anyone.

Selling is collaboration -  two people aligned toward the same goal.

In ROOTED Growth, a holistic business coaching program, we help you take this shift beyond mindset into embodiment & structure.

You’ll learn how to design your entire sales process to reflect partnership, not pressure - so every conversation feels calm, collaborative and rooted in integrity.

This is also how you move from needing to win clients over to partnering with them in transformation - and create best-fit clients who can’t wait to work with you.

Shift #3: Practice Consent-Based Sales

Sales is a relationship - just like in coaching or a friendship. 

And every healthy relationship is built on consent.

Yet so many of us were taught to sell in a way that skips that step.

We jump into problem-solving, pitch our offer too soon or try to overcome objections before someone’s even ready to talk about them. 

No wonder selling can feel pushy!

💎 The Shift: Ask for consent before you go into the next step.

It might sound simple, but this one change can create an entirely different experience - for you AND your client.

Because rather than using force, you’re creating safety & choice.

For example, you can ask: “Would you like to hear a little about how I could help with that?”

The beauty of this is that instead of tip-toeing around your services, feeling confused if you’re pitching, or deciding ahead of time that people aren’t interested, you can simply ASK.

And the cherry on top? People are more likely to say yes when they feel their autonomy is honored.

It’s the same principle you use in coaching: creating trust and agency with your client.

→ This is the third deconditioning, moving from force to safety:

You don’t need to push to sell.

Selling can actually feel good when you create safety. 

In ROOTED Growth, I’ll show you how to lead consent-based sales conversations that build deep trust - from the first message to the final yes.

You’ll learn how to stay grounded through objections, listen with presence, and guide with calm confidence - so you can hold space like a leader, instead of performing like a salesperson. 

Inside is where we help you cultivate the emotional mastery and conversational leadership that makes it possible.

And THIS is how you can create full-body yeses, where your clients feel safe & certain that you are the one for them.

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💫 Bonus Shift: Objections Are Invitations to Connect Deeper

Most people dread objections because they mistake them for rejection.
But objections are actually where the magic happens.

Objections mean your potential client is really thinking about working with you.

They’re imagining themselves inside your offer. They’re checking: “Is this really for me? Can I trust this? Can I trust myself?”

Which is why if someone’s asking questions about your program, it’s a GOOD thing! 

It’s not resistance - it’s contemplation to take the next step.

Objections aren’t walls to break through - they’re doorways to deepen trust.

And as a coach & space holder, this is where you can really shine. This is your zone of genius.

When you meet your client here - with compassion and clarity, that’s often where the “yes” happens.

Inside ROOTED Growth, you’ll learn how to anticipate and respond to objections in a way that deepens connection & showcases the brilliance of your offer.

You’ll know exactly what to listen for and how to guide someone through their fears without ever leaving integrity.

Because when you can hold these moments with confidence instead of contraction, objections stop being obstacles and become turning points that bring both of you closer to a true, aligned yes.

🌿 A New Way of Selling Rooted in Integrity and Ease: 

Let’s tie all three shifts together:

• Focus on the client, not yourself → dissolves pressure and manipulation energy.

• Remember you’re on the same team → replaces convincing with collaboration.

• Ask for permission & practice consent → replaces pushing with safety and trust.

These aren’t just mindset shifts - they’re the foundations of a sales process that actually creates more clients.

Because when you sell in integrity, you sell more, not through effort or performance but through genuine connection and clarity.

Inside ROOTED Growth, the holistic business program for Asian women coaches and community leaders, we take these insights & turn them into embodiment.

Together, we build the messaging, systems and mindset that help you:

• Build genuine trust with your audience

• Create best-fit clients who feel like soul matches

• Grow sustainably - without burnout or betraying your values

And on a deeper level, you’ll decondition the proving patterns & performing energy, and rewire how you show up in every client conversation so sales becomes sacred service again.

This is the program where you unlearn the old “sales” rules and build a new foundation - one that reflects who you truly are: a confident, values-led coach & leader. 

Imagine:

• Client conversations that feel like connection instead of salesy pressure.

• Selling that feels lighter, more intuitive and fully aligned with your purpose.

• A steady stream of aligned, ready-to-invest clients because your energy and messaging finally match the caliber of your work.

🌿 Join ROOTED Growth today.